When the whole stud-everything-and-your-momma thing came to be last year, I thought the Bedazzler would stage a comeback. And then in January of 2010, Jennifer Love Hewitt sort of aided the cause when she waxed lyrical (ahem, excuse the pun that you're about to realize happened) about getting vajazzled -- yes that's a Brazilian plus a little Swarovski decor to cover up the bare. Of course, someone read about all of that and thought to themselves, "well what could be more ridiculous?" -- except that instead of allowing that question to remain rhetorical, he/she answered it. And the results are:


Phil Says Head Designs' Baldazzle, a painstaking glue job of about a million little crystals onto a bald dome. (A cap version is available so you're not glued to the barber's chair for a million and one years.) Admittedly, his site features much more innovative head art, so it isn't all cheese and gimmick.


And then there's the Backtacular Gluteal Cleft Shield, whose name already suggests it expects to move into the Hall of Ridiculous Inventions. This would've been infinitely more marketable in 1999, when Mariah was teaching everyone to cut waistbands off jeans and expose their beautiful cracks, but is essentially a denim sticker to cover the offending plumber's crevice, and bling it up with some shiny rhinestones at the same time. It's all about class, baby.

Images: Stylelist and Metro UK